Eric and Jessie Part 2

First Weeks at Home

ERIC

I had no idea just how helpless I really was.  In the hospital there were so many nurses anticipating my needs and helping me. At home it’s just me and my mom and I feel bad asking her for help with so many things.  I learned how to do some stuff with my feet like change the channel and type on my computer.  I tried playing video games but that was kind of a disaster.  Ive been going to rehab for 6 hours 3 days weeks. Although the wounds on my stumps are almost healed they are still very swollen. The swelling should be going down faster than it is.  That means is going to take me even longer to get arms.  Until then, I’m stuck with my mom feeding me like a baby because I’m not flexible enough to use my feet.  I also need her to bathe me and change my catheter.  At first I didn’t want to use a catheter.  After having to walk up to your mom and say “mom I have to pee, can you please help me?”  I changed my mind on the catheter real quick.  It was pretty humiliating needing your mom to get your dick out, aim, shake, wipe and them put it away. Right then, I kinda wanted to die.  She was constantly telling me things would get better but it was hard to see the silver lining.  I had this sinking feeling I was going to be living at home for ever. 

Eric and Jessie Part 1

Eric

Damn that was a weird dream!  Why hasn’t my alarm gone off?  I haven’t slept in since college but I must admit it’s kinda nice.  Wait, something feels wrong!  My arms, it’s like they are really heavy and fuzzy?? No, that’s not it. 

“Eric, can you hear me honey.  Open your eyes”. 

“Mom, just a few more minutes.  Go away. I don’t feel well”

“I know you don’t feel well, that’s why I need you to wake up.  You were in a bad accident.”

I slowly start to come around out of the fog.  I open my eyes and my mom is standing over me with her red rimmed eyes.

It starts coming back to me.  I spent the day at the zoo with my longtime girlfriend.  We had dinner reservations and I was going to propose that night.  What happened?  I don’t remember anything after the getting to the zoo. 

“Mom! What happened?  Where is Jessie?  I remember getting to the zoo, then nothing”

It was clear my mom was trying to hold it together.  She took a deep breath and then told me what she knew.  We were on the park trolley and it collided with a bus.  Apparently one of the driver’s was texting.  She got choked up again and then continued “You were thrown from the car and your arms got run over by a tram car.”

I cut her off before she can continue “Fine fine my arms will be fucked up for a few weeks, what about Jessie?  Is she ok? When can I see her?”

“Honey, Jessie was seriously hurt but they think she will be ok”  another deep breath “She lost her right leg above the knee and her left leg is very damaged.  They thought for a while she had some spinal cord damage but luckily that wasn’t the case.”

I started to cry, how could the best day of my life end like this? How would she cope with having one leg. She loves to run and hike. Will she get depressed?

My mom breaks my thoughts.  “Honey, there is one more thing.  Both of your arms we amputated between your elbow and shoulders “

I froze, stunned. No, that couldn’t be true.  I still felt them, even though they felt funny. No! it must be some mistake.  How will I live and work?  I can’t possible lose my arms.

I steal my nerves and I slowly turn my head to right and then to the left.  I’m horrified to find matching bandages ending half way between my elbow and shoulder. I want to scream or cry but I can’t do anything but lie there processing it all.  What the hell am I going to do?

My mom bends down to kiss my forehead and she stops trying to hide the tears running down her face. 

Just then the doctor walks in “Oh good you are awake! How are you feeling? Any pain?  I know this is a lot to take in right now but we left you with two good stumps.  They are the perfect length for prosthetic arms.”

He is way to chipper. All I wanted to do was punch him in the face with hands that I didn’t have. “I’m not feeling much pain, can I see Jessie?”