All Of You, Table Of Contents

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4  
Chapter 5 
Chapter 6 
Chapter 7 
Chapter 8
Chapter 9 
Chapter 10 
Chapter 11
Chapter 12 
Chapter 13 
Chapter 14 
Chapter 15 
Chapter 16 
Chapter 17 
Chapter 18
Chapter 19

 

 

All Of You, Chapter 1

"There seems to be either a problem with the connection to your household in general or your router is broken. I'm afraid I can't test that from here, I'm going to connect you to our local technical support."

"Oh... okay... but why-" I start but the woman from the service hotline is already gone, replaced by some jingle. I let my cellphone sink, sighing in defeat. This is the fourth time I called today because I have had no internet connection for three weeks and today the land line died, too. The woman that has connected me further was already the sixth person I spoke to today. So far everyone has had another suggestion but nothing worked, I am still cut from the outside world. It feels weird, especially considering that this had been standard just a few decades ago: not being able to communicate with whoever I want within seconds.

All Of You, Chapter 2

The technician is not overweight at all, if anything he is rather on the skinny side. He has jet black hair that could maybe use a haircut and wears a simple black jacket to blue jeans and sneakers. He is not looking up at me, I do not even think he has noticed me yet because he is focused on the steps in front of him. As I watch, he takes one at a time, clutching the handrail with his right hand. From his flexed left arm dangles a cane but he is not using it, merely pressing it against his body with his left hand curled into a fist. His left foot bumps into almost every step, dragging it up seems to require an immense amount of effort, while the leg remains slightly bent at the knee even when he pauses shortly on top of a step before continuing. My eyes seem glued to it, I just cannot look away.

All Of You, Chapter 3

My internet connection gets fixed by the cable company two weeks later. Thanks to Jacob I could connect to the internet even before that, at least from time to time. I think about calling Jacob, thanking him or asking him how to enable the reboot functionality again now that everything should work fine but I don't. In fact, I am terrified.  Jacob appeared at my doorstep like some ghost from the past and triggered old feelings in me, kindled a desire I had thought long forgotten.

All Of You, Chapter 4

Marcus has texted a lot. Many of those messages I did not even read before deleting. He sent another hundred roses only a few days after the first. One day he stood at my doorstep. He cried a lot. I did, too. We decided to give us a chance.

All Of You, Chapter 5

Thoughts about Jacob grow into an obsession over the following weeks. I google TalcTech but it seems impossible to find out where the company’s offices are located in the city. TalcTech seems to operate exclusively as service provider for larger companies and they have neither a website nor advertisement of their own. Even the invoice for checking my router went directly to my telephone company.

All Of You, Chapter 6

I am awfully nervous and as a result I stand way too early outside the building of my apartment. This is quite an achievement considering it took me ages to decide for an outfit since I still do not know what we will really be doing and I changed my mind several times when I already was on my way to the door. In the end I settled for loose khaki pants and a pink tank top. I threw a gray sweater over, too, because the air is still fresh. It conceals my curves but showing them off is not really my aim here, right? So that is probably for the better.

All Of You, Chapter 7

The image of Jacob pops frequently and unbidden into my mind. As I test a program run at work on Monday and I watch the numbers tumbling over the screen I have his back in front of my eyes. I can see his shoulders, moving under his shirt as he pulls the lever with his right hand, sweat forming at his neck, the tips of his hair wet with it. I shake my head to get rid of the thoughts.

All Of You, Chapter 8

It is almost funny to see Marcus struggling with not asking whom I am texting all the time. I told him I cannot stand his jealousy and he is trying not to be anymore. But he is gloriously failing. I catch him reading my texts to Jacob on my phone one evening and we have our first major row since the near-breakup. After that, Marcus is absent more frequently and for increasingly longer times. Stress at work, he says. I know from a friend of ours that this is not true. He is playing poker and drinking.

All Of You, Chapter 9

Jacob lives closer to the city center than me. Only before we actually reach it, we turn left at a junction and the Jeep follows a wide road. The further we drive and the higher we get, the larger the houses grow to the sides, hiding behind walls of stone and dark gates, surveillance cameras looming over those who pass by. Finally the Jeep slows down. An electric gate opens silently and closes behind us after we have passed it, and Jacob parks the car in the shadow of two oak trees, directly in front of a house. At least, I assume the building is supposed to serve for living in it, although I cannot imagine it to be much fun. In one word: reduced. It is white, rectangular shaped with a flat roof and approximately two stories high although it is hard to tell since there are no windows except for narrow horizontal slots close to the top.

All Of You, Chapter 10

I collect the plants we did not manage to bring into the earth and our tools while Jacob carefully limps over the lose earth back to the house. He proposes I take a shower before he drives me back home. I very much appreciate the offer and take a long time scrubbing all the dirt from the stable and the garden off me in Jacob’s huge walk-in shower. The bathroom is monstrous and a little intimidating in all aspects. First, it is larger than my living room. Second, it is entirely clad in black marble. The indirect light is more of an illusion and the room stays mysteriously dark, the shining armatures glittering menacingly.

All Of You, Chapter 11

I do not understand why Jacob likes it. To me it seems strangely ironic that someone who has difficulties moving half of his body enjoys watching others do it in perfection.

All Of You, Chapter 12

Jacob and I have started spending more time together at the stables. I do not feel too bad taking Jacob with me, since Marcus is not interested in being there at all and I would spent a great deal of time with the horses anyway. Jacob’s initial reservation towards the large animals seems to dissolve more and more with every day at the stables and he gets along well with Chardonnay.

All Of You, Chapter 13

“That guy you texted… Jacob… he is disabled.”

It is not a question Marcus fires at me as he blocks my way out of the kitchen in the early morning. I suppress a sigh. I guess we need to go through this right now. I take a deep breath, bracing myself and trying to clear my sleep-hazed brain.

All Of You, Chapter 14

Rain is splashing against the windshield, running down the glass in big streams. My rubbish wipers barely manage to clear any of it away for me to see clearly. To make it all worse, my vision is already blurry from the tears that just will not stop, running over my cheeks like a mirror of the outside. I should park the car somewhere, I know. But I do not feel like stopping.

All Of You, Chapter 15

I am holing myself in at Jenna’s for the time it takes Marcus to move out of my apartment completely. I have texted him, a short message basically saying that it is over and I do not want to ever see him again. He tried to get back to me several times, he even somehow got wind of where I stayed and showed up at Jenna’s doorstep but she had nothing of him coming inside. I heard her slam the door in his face and turned around in Jenna’s huge bed, covering my face with a pillow.

All Of You, Chapter 16

“Marketing!” Jenna storms without warning into my office. Today she is wearing a hideous yellow sweater and a pink flower in her hair. The colleague sitting at the desk across from me rolls her eyes and demonstratively puts her headphones on.

All Of You, Chapter 17

Looking back I do not remember what follows in all detail. I still know that I tell Jacob about Marcus and our break-up. It takes me some time to formulate what I want to say after that. I know I cannot keep it for myself any longer, it would not be fair to Jacob and it would eat away on me and anything that may evolve between us. Since I have met Jacob I knew that should we ever come to this point, I had to tell the truth, and it has broken my heart just to think of it. Still, I manage to collect all my courage and tell him, with my nerves aflutter and my voice barely steady.

All Of You, Chapter 18

I watch her from the desk as she baths in the evening sun outside, leaning against the balustrade of our balcony with her back towards me. The orange sun leaves golden flecks in her hair that is moving in the wind. A gush of air blows into the living room, ballooning out the white curtain and shielding her from my view. The weather forecast has foretold heavy summer rain towards the end of this day and I have a feeling that the first drops are going to fall soon.

All Of You, Chapter 19

My fingers close tighter around the handle of the cane as a hurricane of applause rises around me. Cait’s hand lifts to cup mine, squeezing lightly.